Enjoy the time you have before the news comes...

"They say ignorance is bliss because once you know about the tumor or the prognosis, you can’t go back. Will you be strong or will you fall apart? It’s hard to predict so don’t worry about it. Enjoy the time you have before the news comes. Yep, ignorance is bliss."

Tomorrow surgery comes to an end - and with it, the formal part of my medical school training. I've got a research month left in April, but that's more "looking toward residency/fellowship" than finishing up med school requirements. In a way, med school is over in 21 hours.

I think I have PTSD, or I've sniffed too much anesthesia gas second-hand this month. I'm already forgetting all the terrible stuff and just super excited to be at this point. So even though I'm nervous/slightly anxious about what March 15 will bring, I'm bright eyed and ready for whatever it is.

In the meantime, I'll embrace the fact that the fellow thinks I have a little "inner surgeon" and let my "inner pediatrician" that is exhausted come back out. 3:30 is not the appropriate time to get out of bed. I'm really glad my specialty choice defends this ;)

Do not alarm the makers of the tiny humans. They will eat you alive.

"This is not general surgery on a miniature scale. These are the tiny humans. These are children. They believe in magic. They play pretend. There is fairy dust in their IV bags. They hope, and they cross their fingers, and they make wishes, and that makes them more resilient than adults. They recover faster, survive worse. They believe."

Day 1: Peds Surgery.
 I realized rounding this morning that much of that quote is surrounding the 5C nurses station. Loved it!
This rotation so far is kinda fun. It's early mornings and long days, but rewarding. I feel like I'm going to get a pretty good bit out of it (if only when to consult/not to consult/who to talk to, etc). I'm gaining an appreciation for what happens in the OR and the stress the patient must be under after. For some reason, it's a lot more real on kids (probably because I like kids more, but I digress). Watching the NICU peanuts on the table all draped out, you can't tell they weigh 500 grams. Then the drapes come down, and you're faced with the reality that maybe, just maybe, this is why they didn't want to rush this kiddo to the OR. Of course I'm always going to find myself siding 80/20 with the neonatologists - but that 20% is going to be gleaned this month.

The surgeries can be more technically difficult due to the size, and at a few moments today I found myself thinking that Dr. W looked a lot like a vascular surgeon operating with the mag goggles on... lol. But alas, it was a whole baby under there.

Not only am I covering the NICU (and LOVING it), we were done for the day at 4:15ish and I'm off this weekend!

If only the next 27 days could go like today...